{updates} :: the wheels are turning

I swear, I'm going to stop the dramatic bi-weekly comebacks.

There really is stuff going on, and I promise I will be back to write about it. As soon as I can find the time...which literally may be next week...but, this is what having a lot of life to live is about:)

Stay tuned...

{whole children}::soul space

For the past couple of weeks, things have been a bit challenging at the Utterback house. As is the case with most 4 year olds, we have been having a tough time getting our boy to listen to us. Let me just get really real here, and tell you, there are days I've felt like I'm in that movie The Others with Nicole Kidman...you know, the one where she and her children are living in this house, and there are other people there, she doesn't understand why they won't acknowledge her, and then realizes that she is actually dead...and a ghost? That's where we have been. I mean, I'm speaking, and I hear the words coming out of my mouth...TEST 1, 2!, TEST...TEST!!...but, alas there is no reaction from my child. You know that blue-in-the face feeling?...yeah, I've had it for about a month straight. Yeah...it's not working for us.

I prayed for a solution, and gave myself a good, hard look...and what I realized is that I have not been keeping a tight enough reign on my household.

Now, don't get me wrong...I'm not talking about being strict. What I'm talking about is the responsibility bestowed on mothers to set the tone of their homes. We all know that careful planning and organization are key for keeping finances in check, and for promoting responsibility. However, I think what's even more key, is what it does for the spirit of your home...and especially your children.

For the past couple of months, I have been asking him a lot of questions that begin with the phrase..."What do you want?"...you know, to eat, to wear, to do, to watch? Ugh! Now...at first glance (and, if you're inclined to believe the stupidity of our society), that doesn't seem like such a bad thing. Of course we need to give our children choices. However, I have basically been letting him lead me. *self-truth punch to the gut!* Because, I have so many different things on my plate right now, I was basically looking to him...my 4 YEAR OLD!...to take over some of the decisions! It's not something that I did consciously, and as soon as I realized it, I immediately put a stop to it. However, I had successfully created an environment, where there was no solidity...and, it showed.

I fully believe children need to have the basic understanding that someone's got their back. For the home to be a purposeful, well-run entity is to create space...for peace, harmony, and development. Children don't need to have to make the choices about meal planning, activities and clothing. They need to be learning and soaking things in...discovering and getting lost in imagination. While that sounds whimsical...it's imperative. It's how they develop who they are going to be. They need soul space.

Speaking of soaking things in...our situation also has another component. It's one we all know well...Television. As I write this, we are on our second day of a TV blackout week, in our home. I like TV. It's fun, it can be educational, and I think it can be an asset...occasionally. I'm sad to admit, we had created a habit of turning on the television. We like to keep up with current events, and we like to be entertained. Add to that, DFW decided to have a northern-style winter, this year. There were weeks on end that we didn't leave our house much.

*information and noise overload*

Have you ever felt frustrated, like you're about to lose your cool, when all of a sudden the air unit shuts off, or the hood fan over your stove turns off, and you realize that THAT was the source of your ire, and you didn't even realize it? Background noise is a major soul-sucker...especially when that background noise consists of opinions and rancor, angst, bad attitudes, self-glorification, and disrespect. I realized that Jax' sporadic behavior could be linked to the fact that the TV was on, all the time. A day and a half into the blackout...and things are 200% improved. He is calm, engaging in conversation, decompressed...like his spirit is quieter. It's not just him, either. All of us have soul space...to think, to ponder, to imagine, to hear, to listen...to observe. We have been putting on music, and that has given us the space to worship. It's been awesome! Like I said...soul space.

We are going to keep going with our experiment. As for me, I am going to be more purposeful about what's going on in my home. I don't have the right not to. For me, that looks like getting up early in the morning. I need to receive from the Lord...His love, His word, His wisdom. I need to get my head on straight, before everyone else needs me to do it for them. I'll let you all in on how it goes as I forge ahead this week.

Take inventory on the spirit of your home, too...it's well worth it...and getting back on track is so much quicker than you think! It's all about the soul space!

{whole body}::oil cleansing method

I was blessed with pretty good skin. I think there were a couple of months back in 7th grade, before I cared enough to have a good skin care regimen, that I broke out around menses (which my husband now lovingly refers to as "shark week"). Other than that...my skin was always pretty good. However, around ages 25-27, things started to go awry.

Acne has still never been an issue...but, peaches and cream I am not. Certainly, there are hormone and health issues that have contributed to the problem...but, drab does not even begin to describe my the lack of luster on my face. Not to mention, the added porous enormoucus that is the bane of my T-zone. Bonus.

I long ago stopped using commercial skin products...maybe as long as 9 years ago. That certainly helped, and there is one product that I will never again go without. However, none of them actually changed the landscape and structure of my skin.

Enter: Crunchy Betty.

This chic's blog has changed my life. Her rockin' wit and tireless pursuit of natural skin care have contributed to my daily life in a wonderful way. Not only do I no longer spend extra money on skincare products (even organic, the integrity of which, is now called heavily into question), I hardly spend any money at all. Not only that...but, my skin is glowing, again!

The biggest contributor to my improving skin, is The Oil Cleansing Method. I literally had NO IDEA, that this option existed. I was definitely skeptical, because well...who ever heard of rubbing oil all over your face, in order to clean your pores?! But, trust me when I say...you'll wonder what in the world you were ever thinking, stripping your face of all of it's benefits...every night and every morning, since you were 9! The first time I did it...my skin looked like it did when I was 16 years old. I could NOT believe it.

{oil cleansing players...Castor oil $6.99, and Sweet Almond Oil $4.59 @ Vitamin Shoppe}

{I use a 70/30 ratio of sweet almond/castor oils, respectively, and then put it in a cute bottle, just to up the feel-good ante. I've had this bottle for almost 2 months...and, it came from the 2 bottles above. Do your own math.}

I love every second of oil cleansing. It is so meditative...so centering. It's good for circulation...and spending 5 minutes, every other day, concentrating on taking care of myself. I highly recommend it.

{just a glimpse of my ever-expanding homemade skincare shelf}

By the way... I highly suggest reading the link about Oil Cleansing Method. I will go into the endless benefits of castor oil, at some point...but, I'm just too lazy, today. However, if you read the link, you will get a jist;)

NO CHEMICALS = HAPPY:)

{whole food}::dirty work

This is the part of the Real Food movement that I don't like...the part that requires me to get the eye of the tiger, when I just want to dance in the fields...the part that has me pacing our family library, with my blood boiling, when I really just want to sit down and write wholesome, fun posts about our little family's journey.

This part is the fight.

It is worth noting that I am so. not. a. fighter. I hate fighting. I bob and weave at every turn. I don't want to do it...except when it has to do with my family, my child...or our food supply. What I've learned in the past year or so has awakened a whole other part of me. Where I would normally feel powerless, wishing I could be more courageous and be willing to go into battle...even if I'm the only one fighting...I am now always at the ready.

I still feel small, but my jaw is set, my eyes are glaring at the horizon...and, if I'm bloodied in battle...I count it an honor. I almost constantly feel the rumble of a far-off drum beat under my feet. I can feel the vigilant masses gathering under home-made banners, with whatever ammunition they could fashion out of their household wares...the heat that is gathering at my back. This...this is full on Braveheart-style, fist-clenching, you-better-believe-we'll-give'em-hell kind of stuff. In short...I'm pissed.

So, what is it that has me all riled up? Big Food. Monsanto. GMO's...particularly the newly greenlit Roundup Ready Alfalfa. Our. Government...past and present...Clarence Thomas...2 decades worth of FDA and USDA officials, presidents, Supreme Court Justices....all those that have paved the way for the murderous hoards to come in an claim what is God's, that he entrusted to us...and to pervert it into the death of the entire world's food, in the name of greed and profit. This is no ordinary case of money-grubbing. This is pure. EVIL.

I will just rant on and on, if I don't stop myself. So, I'm going to re-direct you to a wonderful piece, written by a decidedly more self-controlled blogger @ Homestead Revival.

Let me just say this. I know that God is still in control. But, I also know that we aren't supposed to rest on our laurels, and chalk it up to God's will. It's not His will...it's just what has happened, as a result of free will. He created and cherishes free will, because it's the thing that ensures that we come to Him of a free heart, by choice, because we love Him. He's not going to screw with it. That's why He gave those of us who DO want to be with Him, Jesus. We needed an exit strategy. It was no secret to God that things were going to get bad. It doesn't mean that we need to not fight. It's our duty. If for nothing else...

...so that he can fight the battles that need fighting in the future. So that he doesn't have to live in a Book of Eli world. So that he can have a legacy.

{my letter to President Obama}

Hey, Goliath...

...I'm coming for you.

*Lost-reminiscent bass drum beat* (just for levity)